We all invest a lot into our working lives – our time, ambitions, friendships and emotions.
That’s why if you’re feeling frustrated about something – lack of pay, responsibility, challenge, recognition (all of the above) – it can really eat away at you. Work-related stress is a growing problem and while it can have many triggers, one of the most common is not feeling valued or in control of your job or role.
So how can you get better at asking for what you want and negotiating a better deal, whether around pay or simply to make clambering out of bed every morning that much more bearable? Here are five ways to help.
1. Be clear about what you want
This sounds obvious. Surely if you’re asking for something, you should know what it is you want? It’s true that most of the time, people will have an idea of what their end game is and what they want to get out of a conversation. But what can often get overlooked is compromise areas, or the things you’d be prepared to concede on if push came to shove.
So if that pay rise or promotion just isn’t going to be on the table, what would you accept? Think also if you’re negotiating to achieve a short, medium, or long-term goal, and what might be suitable compromises or incremental steps forward in each context.
The danger if you go into any negotiation without knowing where you’re prepared to retreat to is that you either end up accepting something you’ll regret later or damage yourself by coming across as completely dogmatic and inflexible.
2. Know your value
You may feel frustrated, but what’s your evidence? If all you’re going into the meeting with is a sense of entitlement, you’re already on a hiding to nothing. The more evidence you can stack up to show why your desired solution is going to benefit not just you, but also the organisation, is the best solution.
So be clear about what you’ve achieved and delivered, and what more potentially you can and want to offer. Highlight the talents and skills you have or would like to acquire, and why making better use of these might be positive for everyone concerned.
The theme has to be that this it isn’t about you, it’s about how your company will benefit or gain kudos. At a practical level, prepare, prepare, prepare. It’s a bit like public speaking; the more you’ve prepared and rehearsed your arguments, the clearer and more confident you’ll be.
3. Give them wriggle room
Along with working out what you’re prepared to compromise on, try to visualise yourself on the other side of the table. What is going to be in it for them, and what’s likely to make them feel most positive about what you’re proposing? This comes back to recognising that negotiation is (or should normally be) about give and take.
The best agreements make both parties feel as if they’ve come away with some benefit, so think about what that’s likely to be from their perspective. Present an opening position or demand, but listen, respond and be ready to adjust to what they’re saying. This is also why it’s so important to be clear in your head about your ultimate goal and your reasonable compromises. If you know these, you’ll feel much more in control of the ebb and flow of the conversation and how much you’re willing to adjust or accommodate.
If you present an ultimatum or ‘fait accompli’, you’re much less likely to get agreement. Further, there’s a much greater chance of things becoming confrontational. Remember, if you do go down the ultimatum route you may have to be prepared to have your bluff called and see it through.
4. Do make it face-to-face but don’t make it personal
It makes sense ahead of any negotiation to get your thoughts in order by drafting out on paper your goals, demands, and possible compromises. And while an email or call can help in terms of getting the process moving, by and large it always make sense if you can to negotiate face to face.
Face-to-face negotiation simply makes things more personal and helps to avoid confusion. Ask for a room to be booked or a specific time set aside so the conversation won’t be interrupted or eavesdropped on.
5. Pin down what’s been agreed
In any negotiation, it is vital both during and after the conversation to run back through and confirm what has been agreed. You should also follow up the conversation with a letter or email confirming what you’ve understood has been agreed upon and in turn ask for confirmation back. It is also important to outline and clarify any timeframes for actions or decisions agreed during the conversation and ensure these are being kept to by, for example, ensuring you revisit them at your next appraisal.
Finally, even if the spark for the negotiation has been a frustration or perceived slight, do work really hard not to make the process personal. Make it about what you can offer rather than the tunnel vision of your manager; your added value rather than the fact you feel you’ve been overlooked for years; the greater good rather than your personal gain. Try to come across as positive, open, honest and reasonable. Even if, in your opinion, the person sitting across the table is the polar opposite of all that.
Also remember if you’ve set out a compelling, costed, reasonable negotiating position and still been dismissed out of hand, then at least it’s crystallised what your next move should be.
Another job that deserves you more!
5 Ways to Negotiate What You Want For Your Career is a post from: Glassdoor Blog
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